A swirling mess of thoughts - it's messy
Because that's what this place really is, isn't it? The openness of the worldwide web, the illusion that someone may see this, yet without feeling like someone is keeping vigilance over my thoughts. It should be a good thing. That I have people caring about me and my thoughts. That people want to know that I'm okay. Yet knowing that she reads my blog just completely turned me off from writing there. It was supposed to be a safe space for me to pour out the darkest and most ridiculous thoughts without being... Made to explain myself, without being asked if I'm okay. I don't know why I don't want her to know. It always ends in a fight, in her lamenting how her life was so bad and how she tried her best so it's not her fault. I've never said it was. Yet my sister and I both hurt from the childhood fate bestowed upon us. Maybe, as much as I think she needs to let go, I do too? I don't know. All I can understand is that I'm not happy with the current...